There’s been much debate about the slow death of newspapers, the nails of the coffin coming from the easy access to information via the internet. Many newspapers made the leap and here’s a case in point.

This morning’s San Francisco Chronicle on Kindle contained 185 articles, with thirty in the Sporting Green alone. It’s a rare day when there are less than fifty articles in the daily edition.

The subscription through Amazon is $5.00 a month.

There are no advertisements at all, though I suspect that will end someday.

A hardcopy daily edition outside of the Bay Area is $1 except for Sunday ($2.50, I think).

Newspapers that do not adjust their business models to this electronic reality should go out of business because the refusal to use available technology means they are reporting yesterday’s old news and that is a failure of their fundamental mission.

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Beyond irritated at this cold or flu or whatever that’s got me on the disabled list. Will spare you the detail of the yuckiness but the fun part is my legs are trying to convince the rest of the body that it’s time to go outside and everything else is having none of that. As a timekiller, let’s peruse the headlines.

Much e-ink has been spilled on the Michael Vick thing and almost every printed opinion has a dog disclaimer: “I love the puppies.” Have yet to read an article where an author says he/she could live with or without them, so why waste our time with the disclaimer? Be original and say you hate the furry little maggots. (By the way, I love the puppies.)

(more…)

From the News of the Weird weekly digest:

After languishing for two years in the Irish legislature, the Nuclear Test Ban Bill of 2006 has recently been rethought and refurbished, according to a June report in the Irish Independent. Originally, the bill codified the United Nations Test Ban Treaty, adding some provisions specific to Ireland. Among those additions was the punishment for anyone detonating a nuclear weapon in Ireland: up to 12 months in jail and/or a fine of up to 5,000 euros [then, around $6,500], along with language that might even allow a person found guilty to apply for first-offense probation. The proposed punishment this time is expected to be considerably harsher. [Irish Independent, 6-27-08]

If you live in Northern Nevada, then most times you have to surf the ‘net to get real news stories with honest-to-goodness thoughtful analysis behind them. It’s not to say the folks up here don’t try, but there’s are only so many political brainfarts you can write about before they all sound the same. Same with droughts, housing problems, and gangs.

So wrapping up this always-wordy lead-in, there’s Peter Hartlaub’s article on break-up songs and he did a fine job, so fine, that it’s a pity I just present the list below. The man resists the Gannett-Newspaper-prone habit of paying attention to entertainment from the last five years and writes about songs from previous generations.
Please click on this link and read the whole thing.

In the meantime…

Share the pain: Breakup songs to die for:

5. “Cry Me a River,” Justin Timberlake (2002)

Psycho breakup line: “Girl I refuse, you must have me confused/ with some other guy/ Your bridges were burned, and now it’s your turn to cry.”

Why it’s a classic: I’m happily married, but if my wife ever got so mad at me that she felt the need to burn our mattress and spread crushed tomatoes all over the house, “Cry Me a River” would definitely be the song playing in the background. The fact that JT wrote this for ex-girlfriend Britney Spears only makes it more legendary. How glad do you think Timberlake is now that she’s someone else’s problem?

4. “Piece of My Heart,” Erma Franklin (1967)

Psycho breakup line: “You’re out on the streets looking good/ And baby deep down in your heart I guess you know that it ain’t right/ Never, never, never, never, never, never hear me when I cry at night/ Babe, I cry all the time!”

Why it’s a classic: This is the “Citizen Kane” of breakup sons. All breakup music must be judged by it. The Janis Joplin version is more iconic, but Erma Franklin’s is equally intense, and in some ways more direct. Joplin sounded a little wasted when she sang it with Big Brother and the Holding Company. Franklin sounds sober, which is much more scary.

3. “You Oughta Know,” Alanis Morissette (1995)

Psycho breakup line: “Every time I scratch my nails down someone else’s back/ I hope you feel it/ Can you feel it?”

Why it’s a classic: Where to start? Pound for pound (or line for line) this is the most anger-packed breakup song ever. Even Amy Winehouse wouldn’t think to write a song this crazy. Morissette also frequently performs an acoustic version, which is even scarier, because you can hear the lyrics more clearly. Based on this, the government should have put Dave Coulier and everyone else she dated in witness relocation.

2. “Against All Odds,” Phil Collins (1984)

Psycho breakup line: “I wish I could just make you turn around/ Turn around and see me cry!”

Why it’s a classic: “In the Air Tonight” has a better urban legend, but this song - written after Collins’ breakup with his first wife - packs more emotional impact. He sounds like such a colossal wuss that you almost want to turn the song off to save him the embarrassment. But you still have to feel for the guy.

1. “I Will Survive,” Gloria Gaynor (1978)

Psycho breakup line: “I should have changed my stupid lock/ I should have made you leave your key/ If I had known for just one second/ You’d be back to bother me.”

Why it’s a classic: It starts off with one of the best openings in songwriting history (”First I was afraid, I was petrified”) and never stops picking up speed. What’s especially great about the song - which was inexplicably written by two men - is the way the narrator grows from a shrinking violet to a self-assured take-no-prisoners love Terminator. Modern medicine will never come up with a better breakup cure than “I Will Survive.”

Why do you watch the Super Bowl? Is it the clash of titans, a bloody match of two finely-honed teams for the ultimate glory in football (which is repeated annually)? Don’t lie. We all know it’s the commercials.

Fortunately for you, SI.com gives us the list of the 10 Best Super Bowl Commercials. There’s Mean Joe Greene and his bottle of Coke, the Bud-wise-er frogs, and the Pepsi dancing bears. And Office Linebacker Terry Tate.

This was a stroke of marketing genius. Insert a large man with NFL-level intensity and anger into a white-collar, pencil-necked, Dilbert-like work environment and just let Terry be Terry. Take it away. dude, and notice there are no sacred cows. Everybody gets a little bit of his “loving.”

This spawned a Terry-verse of commercials that never got old. I stumbled across the below during my intense research and had to watch it ten to fifteen times to ensure it is worthy of this blog. Then I had to watch it for the humongous…human sensitivity training sessions.

Terry is still working in Hollywood under the name “The Mighty Rasta” and has had roles ranging from “Prison Break” to “Bachelor Party Vegas.”

And I’ll let y’all know when I’m not sleeping on the couch anymore.